It is somehow sad, how I can spend so much time in a daze and forget the World of beauty which is gleaming at me from every surface in every moment.

This is my first though after encountering that world. I am already back, though I did spend some time simply trying, and succeeding, in reconnecting. I could reconnect. I can reconnect. I did reconnect. To the pants on my leg, and the threads thereof, and the startling way they rippled and morphed as I shifted my leg.

Logic would say this is a joyous thing. But I was overwhelmed with sadness that I had spent so much time not taking advantage. Not drinking. Even now, I am sad to know that I can slip back, will slip back. I want to be with those who know this beauty.


I am a tiny droid, scurrying in the heart of a Mothership. My instructions are to connect this wire here, to pipe fuel this way, to initiate and power the boot sequence of I-know-not-what. It is within my capacity to carry out these instructions ... that is why they have been given to me.


I seem to remember these moments get longer if I meditate more. So I will meditate more.